I LOVE this, Steve. I'm twittering this quote w/ link. Awesome post, awesome comment!

LauraG, don't let your “but” get in the way. The next time you hear the “but” voice in your head, confront it. Put up your dukes and pound it to pieces. Shove those poisonous “buts” into your garbage disposal and pulverize them. Wash the toxic remains away and watch as they swirl down the drain and become one with the rest of the sewage.

Kick your big but’s a$$.

(Snippet from a post I wrote called “Is Your But Too Big?” at http://millionairemommynextdoor.com/2008/11/is-…)

I LOVE this, Steve. I'm twittering this quote w/ link. Awesome post, awesome comment!

LauraG, don't let your “but” get in the way. The next time you hear the “but” voice in your head, confront it. Put up your dukes and pound it to pieces. Shove those poisonous “buts” into your garbage disposal and pulverize them. Wash the toxic remains away and watch as they swirl down the drain and become one with the rest of the sewage.

Kick your big but’s a$$.

(Snippet from a post I wrote called “Is Your But Too Big?” at http://millionairemommynextdoor.com/2008/11/is-…)

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And my little joke about mooning the boss (don't remember where I heard
it years ago): “I would drop my pants and moon my boss but he'd
probably just get confused and think he was looking in a mirror.”

My post was directed – for lack of better frames of reference – at someone who's 30%, or 50%, or 60% happy. I don't think most people would argue that someone who's 98% happy has much to gain by risking it all. If you feel content – and you are SURE you're content – then wait.

You have to make sure that pursuing your dreams matches up with his life/career and vice versa! It's trite, but it's true: if you are unhappy, he will be unhappy even if he's in a dream job and dream home with dream kids, etc. If he is unhappy, you will be unhappy with your job/home/kids. Everyone has to be – for lack of a better word – cool with their situation. Trust me, Bubelah and I struggle with it every day – but I really have learned that one of the biggest steps I can take to make her happy is to make MYSELF happy.

Yes, you're totally right about the contacts and the skills and even the insurance — that's just a matter of figuring out where to start and starting (maybe not easy, but at least simple). But what about the husband thing? He's in a field where he can't just take off at a whim for a long time, and he likes his field. But going off on a fanciful quest for whatever and essentially living off our savings while he stays home and dutifully works to support my Thing seems wrong.

And the answer to that is communication! We've discussed this, and he's actually *fine* with it assuming a small handful of concessions I'd be thrilled to make. But since I know I would resent having to be the responsible drudge while he got to go do whatever he wanted (there's baggage and history there I'd be happy to discuss privately but not publicly), I don't feel like I have the right to put him in that position.

And I also hear that we should all be stretching ourselves, and scaring ourselves, and pushing our boundaries every day. Because that is how to live successfully.

So – when I'm 98% happy, and have all of the things I value, does this mean I'm living wrong because I'm not JUMPing and scaring the crap out of my self with pulling and stretching and expanding my envelope every day? How do we know when to make these big changes?

Maybe I'm asking at the wrong time in life. I have known I've needed change, and made it happen, in the past. Scary but successful. Maybe I'm not in a place now where I do need to force a change, and that's why all of that “JUMP and move across the world RIGHT NOW” or “scare yourself! now! do it!! (but how?)” is not fully resonating. This can't possibly mean 'leave your life, where you are pretty happy, for something you don't really want but picked randomly off the internet or because you know someone who does, because it is a change and “everyone says” we have to change for the sake of changing.' Maybe we're all being coached to death?